MEN SHOULD BE FEMINIST TOO

According to Chimamanda Ngozi, a feminist is a man or a woman who says, yes, there is a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it, we must do better. All of us, man and woman must be better. Men should be feminist because feminism frees us too. Feminism works towards equality, not female superiority. Its time we do away with this anti-feminist propaganda. Feminism isn’t about taking rights away from men, its equality for all genders and men have nothing to be afraid here.

I was against feminism before and always argued bitterly with feminists. I took my time to research more on feminism and realized that I had never been an antifeminist. I was just bitter with my ex-girlfriend and jealous of my female friends who were doing better in life. Since I declared myself as a feminist, I have received negative reactions from my male friends. One of them told me that I have decided to join the opponent. Which opponent? You see, feminism movements are not meant to start gender wars but create a balance within the existential space of human beings. The intent is creating equal conditions that dignify both men and women and enable them grow to potential.

Gender equality is not ‘woman’s issue’ – it’s good for men too. It’s high time men show solidarity with women. We must acknowledge that girls and women face discrimination and unity is needed to stop those forms of oppression. As a man, I will stand with women and girls in their daily struggles for eradication of sexists and misogynist so that they may have access to equal freedom, equal respect, and equal power. I once heard some men say that what a man can do a woman cannot do better.  Their point of argument was that a woman cannot urinate while standing. That’s just a simple biological process that even animals experienced. We shouldn’t base our argument on that.

We are not in the era of Oloibon Lenana and Lwanda Magere where leadership was based on physical strength. The world has changed, today it’s the most qualified person that should lead. Why are women not ruling the world? Are they not qualified? Both men and women can be more innovative, more intelligent, more creative, and more knowledgeable. There are no specific hormones for these attributes. We need to empower women from community level, and this will also enhance girls’ education. Educated mothers will ensure that daughters go to school and achieve their dreams.

 When I finished pursuing my degree, my mother asked me for a second degree. I told her that the streets aren’t safe to pick my second degree. She advised to bring home a woman who was well raised up. I looked at her and asked, ‘mum, where do you I find such women?’. ‘On planet earth.’ She answered. That was the moment when I realized that I needed to rise and empower young girls and women with the hope that one day God will bless me with one of them, less I die a bachelor even with a bachelor’s degree. I keep on telling men, if you don’t empower your wives, when you die you brothers and sisters will use your children as housemaids. Show her how to apply for title deeds, how to start and run a successful business, how to save money among other things.

Men should be feminists to be role models to girls and  expand their dreams. Young girls and women should be able to see that there are really opportunities, and their only security is not just to be good wives and mothers.

Tyson Okello

Stada Kenya